I thought I could fly

What happens when the Lord tells us one thing, but we feel another? When He has promised blessing, yet we are find ourselves waiting in the desert? When He has told us we will fly, but we feel stuck on the ground?

“I shot for the sky; I’m stuck on the ground.” – Jason Walker, Down

“I’m learning to fly; I ain’t got wings.” – Drew Holcomb and the Neighbors, Learning to Fly

The other day just before the sun rose above the horizon, I noticed a strange cloud begin to form.

Moments later it came together in such a way that it was undeniable... It looked like an eagle.

This “eagle cloud” began to light up - beautiful, golden, glimmering - to the point where it looked like it was almost on fire.

“I want to set the world on fire until it’s burning bright for you. It’s everything that I desire; can I be the one You use?” – Britt Nicole, Set the World on Fire

These words reflect the exact desires on my own heart. I want God to use me in a big way. I want to spread His light throughout the world, to use the gifts and talents He has given me for His glory.

But sometimes in this industry, I feel stuck on the ground, like I’ll never make a difference, like I’m struggling to keep my head above water, much less rise up and soar.

“I thought I could fly, so why did I drown?” – Jason Walker, Down

Then the Lord so gently and faithfully reminds me: This is not His truth. That is not what He has promised. What he has promised?

“but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.” – Isaiah 40:31

God has not only formed each of us like this cloud – in the shape of an eagle, complete with wings to soar - he has also illuminated us to shine by the very source of light that He is.

This is a loving God, a God of beauty and wonder and awe, a God who wants great things for us. In our waiting, in our struggle, in our most grueling and ordinary of days, He is at work.

It may feel like we aren’t doing much, like we aren’t making a difference, or even like we are just trying to keep our head above water. But He is preparing us.

“Strength will rise as we wait upon the Lord… You lift us up on wings like eagles.” – Chris Tomlin, Everlasting God

“Noah had to keep his faith strong through all those ordinary days when building the ark so that when God was ready to do something great through him, Noah was ready too.” – Joel Osteen

He is preparing us for greatness. He is teaching us to fly.

Just as this "eagle cloud" was being illuminated by the brightness of the very sun that I still could not yet fully see, as His followers, His children, we are His hands and His feet – reflections of Him, that we may point others to the one true source of everlasting light.

And one day - when Christ returns or we finally come running home to his arms - we will see Him in His full glory. All our strivings will cease, all our pain will subside...

            "Into marvelous light I'm running, out of darkness, out of pain." 

            - Chris Tomlin, Marvelous Light

As the sun finally rose above the horizon, the color slowly faded from the “eagle cloud” as the sun began to shine even brighter... its color more vibrant each passing moment. 

And a bird just so happened to fly directly into frame straight toward the rising sun as I snapped this final shot.

“The woman was given the two wings of a great eagle, so that she might fly to the place prepared for her...” – Revelation 12:14